Jun 28 2006
Does anybody need work? 
Jun 22 2006
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Currently Reading The Exile: Sex, Drugs, and Libel in the New Russia By Mark Ames, Matt Taibbi see related |
Another Craigslist gem
Date: 2006-05-10, 12:18AM CDT
Fuck you, cleaning the fridge. How the hell do you get so dirty? I don’t eat in there, I simply store food. What the fuck is that stain on the bottom shelf? Do gnomes have parties in here when I’m at work or something? Nasty little gnomes. And, for some reason, I feel really, really vulnerable when I’m bent over, scrubbing your gross shelves. Don’t know why. So thank you for keeping my beer cold, but fuck you for making a mess of it.
Fuck you, paying bills. Every goddamned month? Are you kidding me? I barely even watched TV this month, I still gotta shell out all that cash? And, while I’m at it, fuck your pathetic little late fees. They’re small enough for me to easily ignore them but they add up over time. So thank you for the electricity, water and internet, but fuck you for your constant demands.
Fuck you, deleting old porn to make room for new porn. What man can make this decision? It’s like choosing which of my kids to leave behind on the sinking ship. Am I tired of that one slightly chubby girl who doesn’t make much noise? Fuck, this is killing me. I hate my old ass computer.
Fuck you, changing light bulbs. It’s 2006, right? I was pissed when I wasn’t issued a jetpack in 2000 (where’s my fucking raygun?!?), but I figured by now technology would’ve at least advanced to the point where I don’t have to stand on my wobbly chair and deal with this crap. Two bonus fuck yous: for scaring the crap out of me when I walk into a darkened room, innocently flick the switch and get momentarily blinded by that huge flash and terrifying pop! Also, for somehow convincing your lightbulb brethren to join you, causing a chain reaction that means I’m filled with fear whenever I turn on a light. Pop! Pop! Pop! What, did you all join in a suicide pact while I was asleep?
Bastards.
Fuck you, washing dishes. Yes, I know, you smell funny, and I know the longer I wait, the more weird slime stuff is just gonna accumulate on you. That’s why I’ve pretty much switched to just using paper plates (fuck you, environment) and eating with my hands. I’m a caveman in an apartment.
Finally, fuck you, writing this rant.
Jun 18 2006
SO apparently I’ve been getting some heat for supporting France over Korea in their world cup matchup today.
I feel the need to justify my supposed treason.
1) I have never felt any real ties to the motherland, unless it involved copious amounts of kimchee.
2) I started to show an interest in soccer IN FRANCE. That’s right, I spent a lot of time watching FRENCH PLAYERS. So, therefore, I knew a lot of the french players, such as Zidane, Henry, and Ribery.
3) Oh and having KoReAn PRiDe and pretending to root for your “home team” because suddenly they’re a hot commodity does not make you a true fan. That’s the equivalent of jumping on the Clipper bandwagon this year when the Lakers lost. Yea you know who you are. Location should not be a factor in determing passion.
4) Btw, on a girly note, Korean players are ugly. (and Sandy can back me up on this)
On a funny note, the boyfriend spent the game cheering for Korea in France. Man what a weirdo.
yes I love the weirdo 
Jun 06 2006
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Currently Listening Wicked Game By Chris Isaak see related |
Boo.
stupid date. Stupid Anti-christ nonsense crap.
Stupid day.
::grumbles::
Had a fight, cried, 2 hour traffic.
Sounds like any normal day.
read that many mother are putting off giving birth today. But I think hell has already spawned his offspring early on when Bill O’reilly was born. If I had a nickel for everytime that man said something offensive and stupid, I would have …… $60 but that’s besides the point.
Anywho the world is still intact. Another day.
btw, started watching Countdown with Keith Olbermann on MSNBC. Think about it like the Daily Show with less laughing.
My body has been going on such a autopilot for the past 2 weeks. I often have non idea how I got to work and back. A bit scary, but probably scarier for my fellow commuters who are watching me drive with my knee while I’m trying to eat a tiramisu. I do wonder how I am still alive sometimes.
Btw, anybody know of a good, cheap, gyno? Planned parenthood is trying to charge me $200 for a checkup. I don’t get it. When knocked up immigrants crossing the border jump on medicaid to get it for free, I have to pay because I make too much according to the government. when are we building that damn wall again?
Goddamnit
26 days 13 hours 55 min 17, 16, 15, 14….
